what_the_shock | A bar on the mainland

Miguel had looked around, found a pub with good food and plenty of beer, and called a taxi to get them there. The bar even had $1 drafts on Monday.

They might regret that after these two started drinking.

[Expecting one, and NFB for distance!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

puppy_fair

"She... has all of it, I think," Zack hedged. "I'm not completely certain how, or what, but..."

He hiked up his shoulders a little, reaching for the nearest beer as the bartender brought out their drinks.

It didn't last long.

"I don't know, man. I think maybe she's going to not want to look at what I've lived, when she has this perfect alternative right there besides. She didn't want to look too hard at it before the world changed, you know?"

From:

what_the_shock

Miguel fiddled with his glass before taking a drink. "That's hard."

He had no idea what else to say. "Is it...are you mad at her? For that, or for changing things?"

From:

puppy_fair

Zack swallowed. Shook his head a little.

"For doing something that saves the world? No. I... I wouldn't have minded... anything. A heads-up. A 'brace yourself.' Maybe even an, 'I'm about to do something that could even undo who you are, as a person.' I mean, it didn't. But it sounds like it... kind of undid everybody else. And I'm left... dealing?"

He reached for beer number two.

"I'm left dealing. You'd think it'd be easier to deal with 'the world got better.'"

From:

what_the_shock

"The world got better, but it's not your world anymore," Miguel said. "You're allowed to be...well, you're allowed to be whatever you are, honestly. Hurt? Lost? Confused?" He shrugged. "And the one person who really knows what happened is all tied up in that mess."

From:

puppy_fair

That was about it, really, wasn't it? The world was better, but it wasn't home any more than the one he'd been hiding from on the island for the past few years had been.

"Lost," he settled on. "Lost is a good starting point, I guess."

Beer number two vanished almost as quickly as beer number one had.

"I couldn't go back before, anyway," he noted. "At the end of the day, maybe nothing's all that different after all."

From:

what_the_shock

Miguel finished his first beer and called for another.

"I guess the difference is that now you could, if you wanted to. You just don't have a reason to. Would you want to try? Fitting back into that world, I mean."

From:

puppy_fair

Zack grimaced a little.

"I don't know," he admitted. "I could go back to Gongaga, maybe. It's my hometown. But there's nothing really in Gongaga except jungle animals and a mako reactor. Midgar.... I don't think I can handle Midgar. There are too many people there who won't understand why all of a sudden, I can't look at them without flinching."

From:

what_the_shock

"It's...weird," Miguel said. "I've never had that happen at home, but I've been to enough similar worlds that I've seen people in one world, fought them, then had to help them in another. And there's no way of telling them why. I probably shouldn't tell them, because what would it do but make someone feel bad that probably doesn't deserve it? It's not like they can change what another version of them did."

He gave Zack a rueful smile. "And that's not remotely as personal as what you're going through."

From:

puppy_fair

"But you kind of get it," Zack noted, reaching for beer number three. "That's something. At least I'm not just sitting alone screaming into a total void."

From:

what_the_shock

"Nah, I kind of get it," Miguel agreed. "And the other part, too. I mean, if someone went back and undid the screw-up that made me what I am...that other me might be happier. Parts of the world might be better, maybe, who can say? But I wouldn't be me. Part of the reason that other me would be happier would be because of all the things he doesn't know. And I can't just give that up."

From:

puppy_fair

"That whole 'ignorance is bliss' thing is great, right up until you realize ignorance could really have actually happened."

He was glad to remember. Wasn't so certain his entire mind hadn't just rallied up against whatever other life had been presented to it, screamed at the dissonance between the two, and then rejected it outright.

From:

what_the_shock

"Ignorant me was a bit of a slimeball," Miguel said. "You probably don't have that problem. But anyway, you know what other people are capable of now. If you didn't, something else might happen. Now you've got warning."

Wasn't that a cheery thought? Have another beer, Zack; Miguel was calling the bartender over again.

"I'll always pick knowledge over ignorance."

From:

puppy_fair

"Seems like the better fit," Zack noted. "The warning. The knowing. I don't ever want to get caught like that again."

Literally or figuratively, really.

From:

what_the_shock

Miguel nodded. "Hey, they've got a brand called 'Spider Bite'." He ordered one for each of them.

"Maybe you'll be more careful than you need to, but better than the other way around," he said. He nudged Zack. "I'd break your world again to save you, but I'd rather not have to."

From:

puppy_fair

"And I'd rather you don't go that far," Zack murmured. "I'm not really worth the world, you know. But I appreciate the thought."

From:

what_the_shock

"You're my friend," Miguel said. "Your world's been shocking awful to you. I'm not too attached to it."

From:

puppy_fair

"Maybe not," Zack said, reaching for the spider whatever beer as it was placed in front of him. "It's been kind of bad, maybe. But there are still good people there. People who don't deserve to die ugly."

He pulled in a slow breath. Hiked a shoulder up.

"I'm one guy. There's no honor in saving one person and letting millions suffer for it."

From:

what_the_shock

"Yeah, I know." Miguel shrugged. "Hey, I never said I wouldn't try to save everyone. But...yeah. Better not to have to, anyway."

From:

puppy_fair

"Better to not have to," Zack agreed. And down went so much of that beer, too.

The bartender was starting to look concerned.

"I'm not going back," he murmured. "I can't face it, but I'm happy it's safe."

From:

what_the_shock

Miguel clinked his glass against Zack's and downed it, ordering another. Hey, if the bartender couldn't handle it, that was their own problem. "I think we've been in this club together before. It kinda sucks, but we'll make our own homes."

From:

puppy_fair

"There are worse clubs to be in," Zack decided. "The 'home is doomed but they'll kill me if I go back' club was way worse."

Like, in general, really.

From:

what_the_shock

"Yeah," Miguel agreed. "And living in a place with friends and people that get it is nice. It's even usually a nice place to be."

From:

puppy_fair

"With only the occasional nightmare fuel," Zack agreed, smiling wryly. "Yeah, I'll take it."

From:

what_the_shock

Miguel smiled back. "It's good to have one of those friends back again, you know. Even if I still need to smack you for leaving on your own."

From:

puppy_fair

"It worked out," Zack replied, blithely ignoring that if ShinRa had gotten wind of him being back on Gaia, they absolutely would have sent their entire infantry to kill him. "You would have been bored, anyway. Most of my time there was spent killing monsters in caves and eating dumbapples."

... There wasn't much else for him to eat in Banora, anyway.